


Nails

by divisionten, QwertysHuman (FormerlyRandomLurker)



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Drama, F/F, F/M, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, M/M, Multi, Romance, leaning how to human
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-24
Updated: 2018-06-05
Packaged: 2019-05-13 04:35:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 16,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14742090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/divisionten/pseuds/divisionten, https://archiveofourown.org/users/FormerlyRandomLurker/pseuds/QwertysHuman
Summary: ...the nail that stands out gets hammered down.What began as an infinitesimally stupid selfish request- asking for something extremely personal from Miu- kept hammering home just how much K1-b0 wasn't wanted. He was too different, and society wanted to slam him into obsolescence.(Fairly dark, adult-themed Hope's Peak AU fic. You've been warned).





	1. Build Him Up

**Author's Note:**

> I'm working on the next chapter of Who We Were, and I know I haven't updated in over a month. Between depression, job stuff, life, and family, it comes at the bottom.
> 
> And then, when I did start writing again, I kind of lost my muse.
> 
> But don't fret! I've been writing this very weird, extremely personal beast of a fic on my commute on my phone, and my muse is coming back! So I'll be updating both of these as I can.
> 
> Word of warning, because I'm not trigger warning individual chapters. This fic includes:  
> Police brutality  
> Abuse (verbal and physical)  
> Death  
> Limb loss  
> Hospitalizations  
> Severe PTSD/Trauma  
> Graphic depictions of medical procedures  
> Miu
> 
> This fic however does NOT include non-con. There's violence and sex, but there's also lots and lots of consent, which is actually one of the themes I'm writing about here anyway.
> 
> I'll also add that while this fic includes, let's say, some steamier bits, it's not a smut fic. What sex you will find is extremely awkward. :D
> 
> That being said, I hope you find this weird thing interesting.

“Hnnngh,” K1-b0 groaned. It wasn’t so much a human sound as a hum of his servos; a warm droll coming from his chest directly, his mouth shut and his eye-screens still dimmed.

Miu understood. He was happy, and she’d done a good job. K1-b0 had gotten more relaxed around her in the few months since they both started at Hope’s Peak, and it was a marked difference from the first few nervous times K1-b0 had gone to get help from her.

Or, more specifically, she’d first gone and dragged him, after she overheard he would need to stay in the dorms for two weeks while his father- no “the Professor”, he never called the man his dad- went overseas for a conference. K1-b0 could skip daily maintenance in the same way one could skip brushing teeth or a shower, but three days in and the effects were visible on his frown in class as he twitched in his seat.

He had tried hiding the tics, but Miu knew he’d either loosened some wire, gotten dust ingress, or both, and after first period, dragged him away to her shed behind the track showers.

Kokichi snickered something about third base as she pulled a panicking K1-b0 down the hall, but he wasn’t entirely wrong. K1-b0 had ripped a hole in his protective suit along the seam between his legs, getting dirt in his chassis right at the space in his inner thigh.

After the care she’d shown, two things occurred. The first, which hardly surprised Miu in the slightest, was that K1-b0 began asking her for maintenance, and eventually even allowed her to do a minor amount of tinkering. Nothing life shattering- he was still the Professor’s after all- but he’d allow her to disassemble a finger and put it back together, or install windshield wiper fluid in a small tank for his eyes so he could clean them automatically (or, as she noticed when she finished, so he could cry tears of joy).

The second was that K1-b0 began staying in the dorms far more often- not permanently, as the Professor apparently lived on the train line by the school- but for two or three week stretches as Professor Iidabashi went on more trips to symposiums or other events.

Miu felt proud. K1-b0’s father figure clearly felt that K1-b0 was taken care of enough that he could leave the robot at school without worrying about him breaking down.

And K1-b0 was delicate machinery for sure. His grip was controlled enough to pick up an egg without a crack, and he was dexterous enough to then break it into a pan without a single eggshell in the food.

For all his metal and wire, he could fold origami, pluck a single petal off a flower, dodge a basketball, catch it, and climb a rope in gym.

He wasn’t a genius, but he could absorb new information like lightning, and he was **_learning_**.

And there he was, stripped bare so she could re-grease his joints under his power suit, relaxed enough in her presence to give her not a manufactured reply of thanks, but a genuine hum of his servos.

“You wanna get up, cumface?” she asked, running a finger gently down his arm, picking up the slick white residue from his grease on her nail. She laughed internally at her own genius, because until he buffed himself out later he really did look like he was covered in… well.

“Have you finished already?” K1-b0 asked, not even bothering to open his mouth, his voice clear from his speaker.

“Awwww, wanted a happy ending?” Miu asked, grinning.

“I wouldn’t say no…” K1-b0 replied, brightening one of his eyes until the iris and pupil drew in, looking at Miu directly.

Miu laughed and frowned. “You… know what a happy ending is, right?”

“A handjob after a massage, no?” K1-b0 asked, not a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

Miu stepped back, a bit surprised.

K1-b0 shook a little on the table, clearly panicked but also not completely back online to have a full blown freak out. Miu quickly slipped her hand in his and gave a gentle squeeze to ground him.

“Oh, the offer was in jest… my apologies. I still do not quite understand sarcasm. Give me a moment to reboot everything and I will redress.” His voice warbled a little, belying his worry far more than his words, but Miu squeezed his hand again and held on until he calmed down.

“But you… you don’t have…” Miu replied, once the whole situation actually sunk in, stammering, before regaining her composure. “Hang on. You don’t have a dick.”

“I do not,” K1-b0 replied, turning his other eye back on as he slowly sat up. He flexed his fingers and twisted a well-oiled wrist. “I… you.. I like you. And you make me… well I feel so warm with you. I don’t think I’ve ever been so relaxed. I was programmed to feel the full gamut of human emotion, and I can’t tell if it’s love I feel with you. Or lust. Or both.”

Miu dropped her greasy rag, stunned. “You… like me? Like, more than just the fact that I’m a fucking amazing robotics genius?”

“I’m not used to this feeling. So I’m not sure. But I think I am? And I kind of wanted to try to see… um…”

K1-b0 looked down and away, twiddling his fingers, face beet red.

Miu’s smile began to stretch, as she picked up the cloth, placed it on a work table, and slipped down next to K1-b0. Putting her head on his shoulder, she slid a hand down K1-b0’s solid (and now extremely greasy) backplate.

“Ah!” K1-b0 yelped, before touching a hand to his side, casing hers in his. K1-b0 relaxed a little, but stayed warm from embarrassment. “You… you like me?”

“You mean aside from a science fair project?” Miu asked, tickling his side.

K1-b0 blushed harder.

“Weeeeell… you’re dickless. And you don’t get off from me rubbing your chassis… do you?”

“It feels… it feels very good,” K1-b0 replied sheepishly. “But I am aware of what human reproduction should be like. And I don’t think the feeling is equivalent, but I also don’t know for sure.”

“Question.”

“Answer,” K1-b0 replied, snuggling Miu gently, smiling a little at his remark, knowing it was the kind of light snarkiness Miu appreciated.

“When I open you up… you get kinda… weird. What’s that like?”

“Oh, I have a function that forces me to relax when I’m opened up and being worked on. Otherwise I would probably be too nervous and shake. After the Professor burned himself soldering me, he added it. But he asked first.”

“Like you are now? Shaking?” Miu replied, rubbing her thumb up and down along his forearm, feeling K1-b0 squirm a little under her touch.

“Maybe…”

“Hrm…” Miu thought out loud, no longer teasing K1-b0 as she considered the situation more seriously. “Do you have an output to like a computer or something? I want to see your code.”

“Ahhh, ummmm, I… well, only the Professor can edit it. But I can show you in read-only, if it’ll help.” K1-b0 slipped a hand up to his neck, uncoiling a cable from under his synthetic hair. “It’s a legacy system though, a lot harder to hack since people just don’t use FireWire anymore.”

“I might actually have a converter somewhere. A lot of this shit is left over from the Ultimate Engineer in the early 2000’s.” Miu bit her lip and rummaged through old boxes, finding an appropriate patch cable.

“Plug to here, here to a USB… and **_viola_**!”

“ ** _Voila_**? Oh wait, that was a joke, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah. I was always more a ukulele fan anyway. Okay. One K1-b0 CAT scan coming up!”

“I guess this **_is_** kind of like a CAT scan in humans,” K1-b0 replied with a nod. “I don’t completely understand my own programming- don’t look at me like that Miu, it’s not like humans completely understand the brain- but I can probably explain some of it.”

“What subroutine am I looking for if I want to find bliss?” Miu asked, almost a little too sternly as she curled into her computer monitor.

“That’s a… bit vague.”

“Like do you have something like serotonin? Dopamine?”

“Um… I guess this would be the equivalents, I think? This one makes me more interested and focused, this is a positive feedback loop if I am praised…” K1-b0 replied, pointing out various sub programs, shaking at the cable coming out of his head. “And this is why I feel a bit lightheaded at the moment,” he added, pointing to another subroutine that acted a bit like when he was operated on.

“Hm, so when you’re opened up, your movement is severely impeded and most of your servos lock up, but there’s an emergency override so you’re not, say, stuck with an open chest left to the flames or some shit in a burning building.”

“Asimov’s laws aren’t exactly as practical as they appear but I **_am_** coded with self preservation.”

Miu just grunted and kept looking.

“Soooo… here’s my diagnosis,” she said, after a few minutes of silence, punctured only by the sound of K1-b0 shifting to lay back down on the workbench. “You’re a learning AI. If I can do a few things to you at the same time with **_maybe_** some kind of Pavlovian trigger, I think I can simulate an orgasm. And hopefully fade off the other things until just the trigger can set you off.”

“Like training an animal to do a complicated trick…” k1-b0 replied, frowning, shaking his head and the cord with it.

“Or a human. I mean kids don’t just shoot out of their mom’s vag already walking and talking. It’s just a thought, though, since I can’t program something like that directly. But we can make a new neural pathway for it and let your learning AI handle the rest.”

“Well, I guess it doesn’t hurt to try…” K1-b0 replied, wary. “What do you think would create that facsimile?”

“Well, lesse, you’ve got a hell of a praise kink, there’s our dopamine. If I open you up, you get all relaxed, and if I rub your chassis, it feels good. More specifically, you were designed to require close contact with people. Which makes sense. Can’t learn from us if you’re antisocial.

“I think if I do all three at the same time, I might just simulate the feeling of being loved, relaxed, and wired all at the same time. Boom. As close to an orgasm as I think I can get, short of giving and programming you a dick.”

K1-b0 twiddled his fingers. “And what trigger did you want to use?”

“Haven’t figured that out yet, but I was leaning towards.. maybe a taser? You’re not going to get shocked like that on purpose and if I do this right I can get you to masturbate.” She grinned wide. “Ooooh, getting off on high voltage. Now **_that’s_** a kink I can get behind.”

K1-b0’s face reddened. “Why don’t we see if this works first?”

“You got it, lover boy,” Miu replied, turning the screen to K1-b0’s diagnostics. “Don’t unplug, I want to see what’s going on inside that tin can you call a skull. Yes, K1-b0, I know your motherboard is in your chest, it’s an expression.”

Miu tilted the monitor so she could watch it from her peripheral vision from the work bench, pocketed a paint knife, and hoisted herself onto K1-b0, straddling him on the table. Miu laughed as she saw a spike in some of his levels.

“Oh, you like being the sub, dontcha?” Miu asked, laughing wildly to hide the fact that she had absolutely **_no_** idea what she was doing. She’d never actually even pleased herself before, let alone another person. She was shooting in the dark.

At least he really enjoyed her company, she noted, as she stroked a single finger down his chest plate.

He shivered under her touch, and she didn’t even think she was doing all that much. She guessed a bit of it was psychological. After all, how many people get a hot genius taking care of them like this?

Two fingers now, she just started from the neck, right where his neoprene was to protect his wires where his neck met head, down the front set of plates, slick from his grease. Ignoring the fact that her legs and skirt were rubbing against pure lard, she danced her fingers down to his featureless crotch, moaning low to try anything. It was a very strange mix of very clinical- she was fully clothed, and he had nothing to hide- and also **_very_** hot.

She was, in some sense of the word, fucking the worlds most advanced robot for the very first time, and she’d be lying if she didn’t admit it was making her a little hot under the collar too.

Okay. A lot. Her face flush, she moaned loudly, before trying to pull herself to the admittedly extremely weird task at hand.

“K1-b0 you’re doing so well,” she purred, uncharacteristically of her to try out how much being praised would actually affect him right now. She watched his levels spike again as he shuddered under her. The combination of praise and touch was actually starting to set him off. She mused she probably could just rub his palms and get the same effect but this felt more right, somehow. She wanted to make some dirty joke, but for once, she was actually both too elated and too focused on K1-b0 to snap out her usual lewdness.

“K1-b0, if I do something you like I want you to moan out loud. ‘Ahh’, my name, don’t give-a-shit. Except, don’t moan ‘don’t give-a-shit’. That’d be…” she trailed off as she moaned herself. K1-b0 was warming up a lot from the increased stimulation, and with him right under her own crotch it felt amazing, too.

“You’re being sooooo goooood, K1-b0,” she whined again as she ran her whole hand down his chest this time. “So fucking good…”

“aAAAaAAa!” K1-b0 cried out, down to auto tune. He couldn’t keep his voice modulator together and the sound was almost ear piercing. But it worked, and K1-b0 seemed to spike higher in his electronic version of dopamine and serotonin.

Miu continued to stroke with one hand and praise him, while pushing the paint knife down into the notch on his chest plate. Would the order to relax as she opened him work? At this point she wasn’t sure she cared. It seemed like both of them were **_very_** much enjoying the experience.

K1-b0 let out an inhuman howl, before going completely silent, everything going limp. Miu dropped the paint knife, watching in horror as he shut down completely, eyes going black and his warmth underneath cooling rapidly. She slapped herself to wake up from her own stupor of the moment, shaking nervously and looking down at the body below her.

He was just a doll now, under her, quiet and lifeless. Worried, she slid off of him and gently lifted up his head to try and force a reset with the emergency shutdown button on the back of his neck.

K1-b0 stayed completely still and silent. Not even his emergency cooling fan was on.

She turned behind her to look at the monitor.

ERROR 652 FULL SYSTEM FAILURE.

“Shit.”

* * *

She’d have to call Professor Iidabashi. But what the heck would she say?

“Ummm so I gave your son a handy and it killed him”

No. No way. No how.

But she also wasn’t going to just go around messing in K1-b0’s insides. Not without K1-b0 himself awake telling her what she should and shouldn’t touch.

She’d have to get his number first. She didn’t know K1-b0’s home address, phone number, anything, so physically bringing his body home was out of the question.

She was almost afraid to touch him. This wasn’t like when she needed to ask him to power down to get debris out of his main fan, he felt… dead. But this was her fault and she needed to be K1-b0’s advocate when he couldn’t.

 ** _His school bag_**. Probably the best place to start. He tended to keep everything extremely organized, maybe he had emergency contact information in there. Miu took a deep breath and steeled herself, ignoring the slick feeling on her thighs. Once she’d contacted Iidabashi she’d take a long, hot shower.

Finding Iidabashi’s phone number was actually pretty easy. K1-b0 had an identification card in the front pocket of his book bag, with his address, a phone number, and instructions to put him somewhere with air conditioning (or, better yet, a walk in freezer) if anyone ever found him passed out. Miu quickly jacked up the air in the stuffy little shed until she began to shiver, and then nervously unlocked her phone.

“This is the office of Tokyo University, Robotics,” an older man’s voice drolled.

 ** _Great_**. Voicemail. And it wasn’t Iidabashi’s personal line, but the university’s. Unless… did K1-b0 just live at Todai- Tokyo U? Miu never considered it but it made sense- it was on the same train line as Hope’s Peak and probably only a thirty minute ride at worst. He never actually mentioned he lived in a house, just that he went home.

The voicemail beeped, and Miu took a deep breath. These were adults, older adults, and she needed to bite her tongue from being her normal self for ninety seconds.

“Hello, I’m a classmate of K1-b0’s at Hope’s Peak. He’s passed out. I have him in air conditioning and tried to reset him but he’s not turning on. Call the school, I guess.”

Miu clicked her phone off, breathing a heavy sigh.

“Fuuuuuuuuuck.”

She was glad she held that one in, she mused, before shucking off all her clothes to clean up in the chemical shower squashed in the back corner of the shed.

* * *

She hadn’t even stepped in the shower when her phone rang.

Unknown number.

It was either a scam or the Professor, if that voicemail of his tracked inbound calls. She threw on a towel- god the shed got cold quick- and picked up.

“Heya. This is Ren, the TA for Introductory AI and Ethical Programming? You called the Robotics office about Kiibs.” The voice on the other end of the line was young- early twenties maybe? So the older voice on the voicemail had probably been Iidabashi’s and this was his assistant.

“Yeah. Um. I don’t think I can carry him down to Todai, even in a taxi,” Miu replied, again, resisting the urge to make some jokes about underground tubes.

“‘S fine. I’ll come myself. It’s okay if you don’t know, but you have any idea how he collapsed? I need to know what to bring with me.”

‘Don’t say mind blowing sex,’ Miu told herself.

“I… think he overheated. Error 652…” Miu added.

“Fuck,” Ren cursed low. “Um, sorry. I’ll be there in a few hours. I have to get a fresh motherboard and find his backup drive.”

“Do I need to call Professor Iidabashi? He’s K1-b0’s creator, right?”

Miu could have sworn she heard Ren stifle a laugh. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll get him fixed up and the rest of the department doesn’t need to know. Can you just stay with him till I’m there?”

Miu grinned internally at Ren’s willingness to sneak around the old farts who probably ran the stuffy college, but wondered why Ren laughed at her comment. Was Iidabashi actually a woman, maybe? Had K1-b0 ever actually said the Professor’s gender? Was that why he insisted Iidabashi wasn’t his father?

Whatever. Office politics were boring and a waste of time. Let the fogeys in Ren’s office bicker later about why K1-b0 blew a gasket.

* * *

Around 8PM, another call. Miu had showered, and dutifully stayed with K1-b0’s corpse, still covered in un-buffed grease and plugged into the computer. She wasn’t stupid enough to hide that if it was going to help fix him.

“Miss? It’s Ren,” the voice said. “I’m at the school grounds.”

“Gate’s shut if you’re not living in the dorms or immediate family after 7:30,” Miu replied.

“That’s not the problem. I’m already **_inside_** the grounds. I just don’t know where you **_are_**.”

“There’s a shed-” Miu started.

“Behind the track? Ultimate Engineer?” Ren asked.

“..y…yeah.”

“Sorry. Hope’s Peak alum. Spent a lot of time in that thing. I was the one who installed the AC in there,” Ren added, jovially, seeming to fill the dead air with his own chatter. “Glad my ID still worked or I would have had to sneak in through that hole in the fence over by the AV lab. Bit hard to do with all this shit. And… door please? Hands are full.”

Miu flung open the door to an extremely handsome young man who immediately pushed past her, massive backpack on his back, bags in both hands and cell phone wedged between shoulder and head, explaining why he kept rambling instead of hanging up.

He kicked a rolling chair up to Miu’s workbench, then carefully put down his supplies around him, unslung his backpack, and pocketed his phone.

“Hoookay buddy lets- uh, gross. Lard?” Ren asked, smearing a finger down K1-b0’s exposed arm and holding the grease covered finger to the light. “You’re… um, are you Miu?”

“What’s it to you?” Miu shot back, barely holding in a ‘fuckface’.

“Was expecting you to be more crass,” Ren replied nonchalantly. “I see you were taking diagnostic while running some tests. What were you two doing when he fried? And don’t give me that look, I swear all he talks about is you.”

“Does he now?” Miu replied, glaring, pulling up a folding chair and plopping down backwards, straddling it.

“Look, I’m not mad. I can fix this,” Ren said, prying open K1-b0’s chest and frowning. “Holy fuck, did he overheat. His logic sisterboard completely melted. Come here, check this out. The only thing intact is the silicon wafers.”

Miu was taken aback. This kid was completely candid about what was not only a million-yen piece of sophisticated electronics fried in front of him, but also that said piece of electronics was very much a person.

Without thinking, she grabbed him by the collar of his stupid Gundam t-shirt and pulled his face inches from hers.

“Renta-Potty, stop playing around and fix him **_now_** , or I will kick you in the nuts so hard your outie will be an innie,” she seethed.

“You… care about him that much?” Ren stuttered, grabbing on to his collar to try and push Miu’s hands away.

“At least one of us does, you three-day-old sack of shit,” she replied.

“I’m Iidabashi. Ren Iidabashi,” Ren stated simply. Miu’s grip slackened immediately in stunned silence.

“The fucker is your dad? K1-b0’s creator?”

“My dad’s been dead for ten years. Mom too. And siblings,” he snapped back. “I wouldn’t be so candid about this shit if I was worried about K1-b0. He backs up every night. Human bodies can’t heal so easily. His? I’ve dealt with **_way_** worse.”

* * *

“Look, why don’t we take a walk and grab some dinner. My treat. K1-b0 will be fine but that’s some pretty bad damage. I don’t think I can fix it in a night.”

“You’re Professor Iidabashi,” Miu stuttered out, still stunned. “Who’s the old guy on the voicemail then?”

“Daimon. Head of the literature department,” Ren replied candidly as he checked the thermostat and held the shed door open for Miu.

“I… I have curfew at 9.” Miu snapped.

“Not if you’re staying offsite for the night, remember I was in your shoes a few years ago. I’ll bug Izumi in the dorms for you and I’m calling a cab. I’d rather fix K1-b0 at home with this much damage.”

“Well, if you wanted to take advantage of me alone in your house why didn’t you just say so?”

“Don’t even joke about that. I’m on the investigation committee regarding a teacher assaulting a student on campus right now. Shit’s not funny.”

Miu frowned. “You’re not what I was expecting.”

“That’s why I’m not on my own voicemail, and answer unknown calls as a TA. Parents don’t trust a 26 year old head-of-department, Ultimate Roboticist or otherwise.” Ren pulled an ID from his pocket.

“Holy shit,” Miu said blinking at the card.

“Tomorrow is Saturday. Got class?”

“Last of the month, so yeah.”

“Wanna ditch and help me fix the most advanced robot on the planet?”

“Do you need to ask?”

* * *

“Be careful, people would think we’re on a date. Bad for your reputation,” Miu teased as she slid into the booth across from Ren at the family restaurant across the street from the campus’s west entrance.

“Iidabashi-kun!” chirped their waitress as she came by with water. “Haven’t seen you in a while. How’s your robot friend doing?”

Ren blushed. “At the moment, **_fried_**. He should be back in working order in a few days.”

“Don’t push the kid so hard, you hear me? He applied to be a server here last week,” the waitress chided.

Ren just blushed harder and shook his head. Miu was starting to understand why K1-b0 was so insistent the professor wasn’t his farther- they were much more like siblings.

“So, your girlfriend?”

“God, no,” Ren replied. “She’s just a current student at Hope’s, and has been taking care of K1-b0 when I’m pushing extra hours or abroad.”

“Never seen you before,” the older woman said with a smile. “You can tell when class lets out because this place is packed with brown uniforms. Ren here would take up an entire booth with his inventions. We banned him from bringing a soldering iron in here after he started working on Kiko’s head on the menus!”

“K1-b0,” Ren corrected with a sigh. “Can we order? I want to take him home to fix before it gets too late.”

“As long as you’re not doing it on the table again, fine by me.”

Ren laughed, and Miu somehow felt so alone.

* * *

 

The taxi driver looked on in horror as Miu and Ren dragged K1-b0’s body, wrapped in a tarp, out to the car.

“I promise I didn’t murder someone,” Ren insisted, unrolling the fabric, showing off the busted-up robot. “He can go in the trunk if there’s space, otherwise we can sit with him on us.”

“Let’s put your bags in the trunk, and have him with you,” the driver said slightly exasperated.

“How much do you owe someone or someone owe you?” Ren asked, grinning.

“How did you-” the driver started, as he lifted up Ren’s belongings and sorted them in the trunk, along with Miu’s overnight bag.

“When I went here, I sometimes had to bring this robot back home two, three times a week. I got a pretty interesting rep with your company.”

“Everything is in,” the driver replied, holding the door open. “I’d say ladies first but go in, I’ll put him on you, and then the miss can slide in at the end.”

* * *

 

“You kept calling ‘it’ ‘he’,” the driver commented, turning off the major highway and down into the district. “Then it hit me. I’ve seen him on the news. You too. You some robot genius, right?”

“Eh. Just persistent.”

Miu tuned out the conversation, and tried to ignore the fact that K1-b0’s feet were at Ren’s end and his head on hers, thick strands of synthetic hair on her thighs. His eyes were dull and off, made more creepy by the utter lack of eyelids.

“We are here, sir, allow me to bring everything to your door.”

That snapped Miu out of her haze, and she got a quick glimpse at Ren’s house.

Or, rather… hotel?

* * *

 

“Tell me you’re not living out of a rented out room,” Miu said, groaning as she helped drag K1-b0’s body inside the ryonkan-style Japanese inn.

“Not again, Master Iidabashi!” cried the night attendant. “Let me get the elevator for you.”

“Wasn’t my fault this time,” Ren shot back.

“Master?” Miu said with a wry smile. “Is this some kinda sex dungeon? What’s your kink, huh?”

“A good book and paying my bills on time,” Ren replied, not missing a beat. “This was my family’s inn. Now I’m the only family left, so it’s mine.”

“O..oh.”

“Hey, Yuki-san, if you could give this young lady a room key for the nicest un-booked room we have for the weekend, that’d be stellar.”

“That would be the penthouse, it’s actually free for once,” Yuki replied. “The guest checked out a day early.”

“Perfect. Make sure a hot bath is ready for her if you don’t mind. And give her a copy of my key as well. We’re both going to fix up K1-b0 in the morning.”

“Room service for breakfast?”

“You know me too well.”

“A customary for K1-b0?”

“On Sunday. He won’t be fixed by morning, I have to program the CNC and I’m not running it this late. Don’t want to wake the guests.”

“Very well,” Yuki replied, helping load the last of the things in the elevator before passing Miu two keys.

“601 is your room, 02 is Master Iidabashi’s, onsen is in the basement but you have a private bath. We’ll bring breakfast to you tomorrow at 8:30.”

Miu just stood dumbfounded a moment, before snatching the keys from the woman’s hands. “T-thanks.”

* * *

 

“Just knock in the morning when you’re up and ready to start,” Ren said, as they exited to the sixth floor from the elevator. “I won’t start without you, unless you want me to. I’ll just lay everything out and get him situated on the workbench.”

Miu frowned. “You start without me tomorrow and I’ll send a soldering iron straight up your asscrack.”

“Duly noted.”

Miu slung her overnight bag higher and unlocked her room.

It was larger than her family’s apartment, a massive sitting room, adjoining bedrooms.

“Crap, it’s all tatami,” she muttered, unlacing her boots, sliding them and her stockings off to walk on the mats. It was a gorgeous old Japanese style space, no wonder K1-b0 was so infatuated with traditional things.

Miu wandered, and laughed at the fact she had to wander a hotel room. There was the main room first, a display of sweets and green tea in the center, three adjoining bedrooms with sliding doors to convert to a larger room, a single futon laid out with yukata in the largest of them all.

And the bathroom.

Miu just gawked. It was the size of her dorm, a hot spring pool.

She didn’t even want to think about how much the room cost for a night.

* * *

 

Miu woke up frazzled. It was seven AM. Might as well abuse the hospitality and go use the onsen.

Ren was so candid, so calm about the situation. She’d not once seen K1-b0 break down, at least not anything close to that level, she mused, as she eased herself into the hot water.

But it sounded like this used to be a pretty regular occurrence. Heck, he’d even surmised it was directly her fault and didn’t even seem mad about it.

She sighed, blowing air bubbles as she sat down eye- deep in the hot water.

Today she’d help revive him.

* * *

 

Miu rapped on Ren’s door at nine sharp. If the penthouse was that nice, she was curious about Ren’s living quarters.

“Come in,” the voice said from the other side. Miu slid the door open, a little surprised.

His room was the same size as the penthouse, she mused, but laid out in a haphazard mix of east and western style. It had a small Western style kitchen, splitting the (admittedly large) living room space- which was tatami- in half.

“Do you have a private pool in here too?” she joked. “Is this the hotel with that porno infinity pool?”

“Nah, small bathroom,” Ren replied, toast half out of his mouth. “If you wanna take a peek around while I inhale the rest of breakfast, I’ll meet you in K1-b0’s room. It’s where the onsen would be in yours.”

Miu crept in bare feet down the tatami hallway, past an unused master bedroom, two futon laid out, unused, with photographs laid on the pillows.

“You said your family died,” Miu stated bluntly, looking at the room.

“Car crash. Parents, brother, sister died, and I lost both my legs.”

Miu frowned. “Your legs?”

Ren rolled up a pant leg, showing off metal and wire in a pattern nearly identical to K1-b0’s.

“Crushed under the car. You think I became a robotic nut because I wanted to help the world? Come on, I’m a selfish bastard. I wanted to walk and I wanted my family back. I got the former pretty quickly, but learned the latter is a shit idea. K1-b0 was me trying to make new family instead.”

Miu just bit her lip. “I was in a coma for a few years. When I came to, it was like my brain was on fire. I… don’t know where it came from. But my genius… it’s not mine. Maybe it was my mind’s way for compensating for lost time. What family I **_did_** have marked me for dead. I’ve been living alone since.”

“But you’re in the dorms now right? You like or hate your room-mate?”

“Ugh. Do not get me started on Kaediot. That bimbo can look at a boy and make them jizz themselves.” Miu froze for a moment. “I don’t know what I would have done without her. Or… without K1-b0.”

“He doesn’t stop talking about you.”

“So you said. **_Terrible_** things, I’m sure.”

“K1-b0 isn’t sure which one of us needs to wash their mouths out first- you or me,” Ren said with a smile and a shrug. Miu chuckled. “Now come on, doctor, we have a patient to revive.”

“You do realize I called you at 4 yesterday right? And you haven’t actually fixed him yet. If he were alive, he’d be way past saving by now.”

“That’s why I’m not a doctor,” Ren replied.

For the first time since meeting him, Miu heard the cracks in his voice begin to show.

* * *

 

“Scalpel,” Ren joked, passing Miu a small laser cutter.

“Sutures,” he added, passing a soldering iron.

“Just stop beating your bush and tell me what to do,” Miu replied, exasperated.

* * *

 

“Lunch break?”

“Just shove something large and juicy in my mouth,” Miu replied, grinning. “I’m marathoning this bitch.”

“One convenience store hot dog then.”

* * *

 

“Dinner, Miu?”

“I just need to check his hard drive.”

“I think…” Ren said, scooting in next to Miu and pulling down the workbench magnifiers. “They have heat and pressure stickers on them. None have triggered. Just replace the wire and let’s turn him on. Otherwise we need to pull his backup down on a fresh drive. Don’t worry, all he’d lose is Friday.”

 _All of that and K1-b0 wouldn’t even remember_ , Miu mused.

Mid sighed, put her safety goggles back on, and replaced the wires leading from his hard disk storage to his motherboard.

“Don’t close him up. If he’s good, an opened chest cavity means his servos will be frozen so he can’t panic.”

“And if he’s not, we can replace the drives,” Miu replied, nodding. “Okay, lets get him all fired up.”

Miu reached her hand behind K1-b0’s neck for the emergency reset.

His eyes began to glow.

“aAAAaaAAAa…” he howled, before freezing. “W… w… **_Professor_**?!”

“Shhhhh, calm, K1-b0, everything is fine. Friday, Saturday, about 28 hours, 652.”

Mid blinked before realizing exactly what Ren was doing, giving K1-b0 the date of his failure, how long he’d been put, and his error code. If the two of them had K1-b0’s revival down to a science, he really did fail pretty often.

“O…oh.” K1-b0 stayed unmoving on his bench. “Can you close me up so I can sit?”

“Of course,” Ren said with a gentle smile. “Miu?”

“Miu is here?” K1-b0 asked.

“Is your eyesight damaged?” Ren asked, worried.

“No, it’s just, I’m in repair mode and can’t turn my head. I can only see the ceiling.”

“Oh, right, sorry, Kiibs, hang on.”

Miu and Ren snapped his chestplate in place, and the difference was immediate. K1-b0 convulsed, shaking nervously.

“Sh-sh-sh. I’ve got you. You’re okay,” Ren cooed, holding out his arms. K1-b0 held on for dear life, sobbing until the wiper fluid emptied all over Ren’s shirt.

Great. By his howl on wake K1-b0 must have remembered what Miu did yesterday, and by his reaction, did **_not_** enjoy it one bit.

If she didn’t feel miserable enough about the situation already…

“S-sorry, Professor,” K1-b0 eventually choked out.

“You’re good, Kiibs, you’re in good hands,” Ren repeated, rubbing small circles on his back as he consoled him.

“I’m good,” K1-b0 finally said, before turning to face Miu, tone finally evened out.

“I… I’m sorry. I failed, I guess.”

Miu shook her head, her long strawberry blonde hair cascading behind her. “Why are you apologizing, I’m the one that broke **_you_**.”

“I just… I don’t know, I feel like I wasn’t good enough.”

Ren’s eyes flicked between the two of them.

“Okay. I want you two to tell me what happened yesterday.”

K1-b0 turned a shade of red Miu had never seen before.

“Okay. I think based on what I know about both of you I can probably take a guess. My bigger question is **_how_**.”

“Miu found… combining some of my trigger reactions together… she could… uhm… don’t be mad at her-I asked her to!” K1-b0 sputtered out.

Ren’s face puckered like an inflated balloon as K1-b0 wiped the last of the liquid off his face. K1-b0 did an emotional turn as he saw Ren’s odd expression.

“Professor, are you okay?” K1-b0 asked, worried.

“I.. I am trying very hard not to laugh, bud. You’re **_human_**. Or as close as I was able.”

K1-b0 brightened at the sentiment, and Ren continued.

“Having feelings for others is part of that package. I just didn’t think I’d have to give the puberty talk so soon. Look, I really don’t want to know your sex life, but at the same time I don’t want to have to resuscitate you after a night out. You’re going to have to tell me what the **_hell_** you did so I can prevent you from being a spider.”

“Spider?” K1-b0 asked curiously.

“Females kill the males after mating,” Ren replied with a shrug.

“Aaaaaaaand, I’m out,” Miu said, flinging up her arms.

“Of course. I wouldn’t expect you to divulge anything to me. It’s awkward enough as-is.”

“It’s more that I’m extremely hangry. I haven’t had anything all day,” Miu replied, trying to salvage her response. Ren was just too… nice. And she certainly wasn’t abandoning K1-b0.

“Dinner’s on me.”

Miu rolled her eyes. “This is like the time my old hag took me out for ice cream after she found out I had my first period.”

“C’mon, Miu, go wash up. I have to help K1-b0 get into his protective suit.”

Miu pushed up from the workbench and finally looked K1-b0 in the eyes.

“Well?” she whispered, as she pulled him in for a surprising, but deep, warm hug. “I can finally tell people I’m so good I fucked a man to death.”

K1-b0 laughed quietly, his chest warming as his servos hummed a little, pulling her in tighter. “It was… pretty amazing, Miu. Thank you.”

* * *

 

“What the…” Miu looked, mouth agape.

She was expecting to come back into Iidabashi’s room-partment after washing up and changing to K1-b0 in his bulky plated suit to keep dirt and water at bay.

Instead, it looked like he was unclothed- slender, a bit gangly even, but all black from the neck down, with none of the exposed joints when his suit was off. And Ren was spraying K1-b0 with a water spritzer.

“Ingress level?” he asked.

“No leakage detected,” K1-b0 replied happily.

“It’s hydrophobic too, so…” Ren added running a hand down K1-b0’s chest, coming up dry.

“This would be terrible for humans though,” K1-b0 noted. “The fabric isn’t breathable. Any water like sweat would be trapped inside as well.”

“Yup, but one of the grad school students designed it for protecting sensitive equipment, and it helps vent some heat, too. And it means something else. Miu, can you grab me the bag I left on the dining room table?”

Miu shrugged, and snatched up the white paper bag, peeking inside, before thrusting it into K1-b0’s hands.

“I can wear regular clothes!” K1-b0 exclaimed, looking down, before hopping off excitedly. “Um, let me put this on and we can all get something to eat! Metaphorically,” he added, bolting out the room to go put on what Ren gave him.

“Oh, stop bringing **_that_** up, bud, I’m working on taste next!”

* * *

 

“I feel like I’m being fucking chaperoned,” Miu hissed, accepting K1-b0’s hand in hers to stares in Shibuya station.

“Why? My appearance, or the Professor?” K1-b0 asked back.

“A bit of both. Have we ever been outside campus together?”

“I don’t believe we have…” K1-b0 replied, holding Miu’s hand a little tighter. “I get this a lot. I’m not sure if walking alone is worse or with others. People have tried to pull off my face before.”

Miu pulled his arm around her back, holding his left in hers and leaning in a little tighter. It was no wonder K1-b0 was so perpetually friendly, he just wanted to be accepted.

“At school?” Miu asked. “Are there any cumsuckers I need to beat up for you?”

K1-b0 grinned, and shook his head.

“No. Some tease, like Hiyoko and Kokichi, but they abuse everyone, so I know they’re not picking on me in particular. I think I’d be more upset if they teased everyone **_but_** me. I don’t much like it, but I do feel as though I’m not treated differently. It’s… nice.”

K1/-b0 leaned his head into Miu’s shoulder. “I know I’m shorter than you, but did you need to string my arm just above your behind?”

“Admit it, I have a great ass.”

“I… I’m not saying you don’t…” K1-b0 whined in protest, face red. “It’s just a little crass in public.”

“Oh, so you want me to be a **_lot_** crass in public. Got it. Sex in an alley next?”

“Miu!”

“What, your **_brother_** seems to approve,” Miu teased. “I swear, he looked ready to high five you. I mean, you **_did_** lose your virginity to a bombshell.”

“He’s not my-” K1-b0 started, then cut himself off. “I… suppose brother is a better term to explain our relationship than anything else,” he added, muttering.

“Do you always call him Professor?” Miu asked, as she watched Ren motion to follow him into a building off the thoroughfare.

“Calling him Iidabashi is too formal, and Ren… too strange. He doesn’t like being called Father or Dad.”

“And **_Professor_** isn’t fucking formal?” Miu joked.

“I heard that,” Ren said, rolling his eyes, holding the elevator open for them. “It’s better than Dad, at least. I’m too young for Dad. I’m only like 15 years older than him.”

“That must have been one fucking awkward teenage pregnancy,” Miu replied, as they stepped inside.

“Ugh, **_tell_** me about it. Most babies don’t start talking back when they’re born. I should show you some of his embarrassing  childhood photos sometime,” Ren added.

“Aurgh!” K1-b0 cried, as Ren reached over and mussed his hair.

* * *

 

Miu stretched, full, and for the first time since she could remember, just happy. Not ‘happy… but’, but elated. K1-b0 was back, in good spirits, she'd been treated to very good food and a lesson in microchip efficiency as she fixed K1-b0 that day.

A quiet knock on the door bolted her upright, and she fumbled her way to the entryway.

K1-b0 stood in slightly oversized pajamas. Probably Ren’s. It was a little jarring to see him in “normal” clothing over a solid black body peeking out the cuffs and collar, but by the looks of him messing with the shirt hem, he wasn’t used to it yet, either.

“Awww, was someone having wet dreams about me?” Miu cooed.

“I can’t dream,” K1-b0 replied nervously.

“Looking for more steamy action?” Miu grinned.

“I’d like to be in class on Monday,” K1-b0 replied, twiddling his fingers. “Forgive me, this new protective suit is so light, I feel naked. I’m worried I’ll break myself. I have full tactile sensation through it and I’m not yet used to it.”

“Why don’t you put on your old suit?”

“Ren took it to work on it. He went back to Todai for the night…”

Miu frowned. “You don’t like being alone.”

“I do not.”

“That makes two fucking losers,” Miu replied. “Come on, there’s plenty of room in here.”

* * *

“This was always my favorite room in the hotel,” K1-b0 commented, sitting seiza-style next to Miu’s futon.

“I mean it explains why you like traditional shit so much,” Miu joked, cross legged on the mattress on the floor.

“Hah. When the room wasn’t booked for a night, I’d come in here after the Professor fell asleep to paint. Or fold laundry.”

“You don’t sleep, do you?” Miu asked.

K1-b0 just shook his head. “I can shut down, but that’s more disconcerting. Especially when I turn on and I’m somewhere else.”

“Like today.”

K1-b0 nodded silently. “I **_hate_** shutting down. I don’t usually have enough forewarning to process it. It’s something done **_to_** me, not something I **_choose_**. And then I’m somewhere else and the Professor is peering over me, nervous. At least now he’s a lot more calm about it. That helps.”

‘So that was why he was so nonchalant. He was probably trying to psyche himself down for K1-b0,’ Miu mused, tracing the pattern on the futon cover with a finger.

“What do you do when we’re all sleeping, then?” Miu asked.

“At school? Read, usually. Or play a game. Kokichi is a light sleeper so I try not to disturb him.”

“Your roommate is Cock-ichi?” Miu barked. “ ** _That_** little half-birth?”

“He’s actually fine in private. The whole teasing thing is mostly a cry for attention,” K1-b0 replied with a shrug, before changing the topic. “Um… actually, could you do me a favor?”

“Hm?” Miu asked drowsily.

“I… um. I always wanted to wear a yukata.”

“Oooh, you want me to strip you,” Miu said perking up.

“I can undress mostly fine, thank you!” K1-b0 snapped back, playfully. “Laces and buttons might take some getting used to, though…”

“You know I was just yanking your chain,” Miu said with a sly smile. “I’ll grab one from the ofuro.”

Miu came back to K1-b0, stripped back to just the black bodysuit over his chassis.

“Slimming. Going to take a second career as a stripper?” Miu asked, playfully slapping K1-b0 on his backside with the obi.

K1-b0 shrugged, in on the joke. “Getting down to the end of the act would be a group production. I can’t get this off on my own. Not yet, at least. It seals in the back.”

Miu put a hand on his side, and K1-b0 shivered a little.

“It’s like you’re touching my chassis directly,” K1-b0 murmured.

“Ohhhhh?” Miu replied, rubbing the spot.

“Ah! Miu, I appreciate it but please… um, actually…”

“Hey, cheap date, sit down. If you start getting too warm, I quit.”

“Ah, um, okay.”

“You just wanted another session, didn’t you?” Miu cackled. “Couldn’t get enough of me and my magic hands.”

“No,” K1-b0 choked out. “But it’s… **_are you rubbing my butt_**?!”

“It’s a nice, firm ass.”

“I’d hope my metal rear is firm. If it weren’t, there’d be larger problems,” K1-b0 replied, sliding his own arm in the crook of Miu’s back.

“You said, and I quote, this was ‘too crass’,” Miu commented.

“ ** _In_** ** _public_** … unless, do you not want me there?”

“I want you **_here_**.” Miu replied, shifting his hand lower. “If…if… that’s okay…”

“I thought nervous embarrassment was my job,” K1-b0 grinned, rubbing slow circles.

“Jeez, who taught you?” Miu whined.

“I… may have uploaded some information,” K1-b0 admitted, sheepishly. “Why don’t I take care of **_you_** tonight? I really would prefer not overheating at midnight.”

“Mhmmm,” Miu moaned. “Ex-cu-ses…”

K1-b0 gently pushed her down onto her futon, straddling her.

“You’d better promise you play rough. **_Real_** rough,” Miu chided.

K1-b0 said nothing, just kneading his fingers and palms up and down her back, her loud, fake moaning giving way to quieter murmurs, then sleep.

K1-b0 picked the robe off the floor and found a mirror. He had a few hours of nothing to teach himself to put on the thing properly.

* * *

 

A light tap on her shoulder.

“Miu?”

“ ** _Miu_**?”

“Your breakfast is going cold.”

Miu shot up, hair cascading in a mess around her.

“No way in fucking hell.”

Miu blinked. K1-b0 was kneeling next to her, properly dressed in full yukata.

“I didn’t help you last night.. seeing other whores in the off-hours?”

“The **_mirror_** ,” K1-b0 replied, shrugging. “Breakfast is in the living room. The Professor had to go to Osaka today, we need to get back to school ourselves.”

Miu frowned.

“So he’s not going to see how you overheat?”

“I’ll stay in the dorms tonight and tomorrow, and talk with him myself when he’s home.”

“I… want to help.”

K1-b0 cocked his head.

“I mean, I feel partially responsible,” Miu said, before realizing what she admitted. “And I like doing… **_fun_** things with you.”

K1-b0 slipped his arm around her. “So do I.”

“Well, then, feed me breakfast,” Miu insisted.

“I… what?!” K1-b0 reddened.

“Cuddle me. And feed me. So we can eat together.”

“As you wish, Princess,” K1-b0 replied, bowing deeply. “Your feast awaits.”

“Oh yes it does,” Miu grinned lecherously, flicking her hair behind her.

* * *

 

Miu sat in K1-b0’s lap. It was warm, and it hummed gently as he ran his fingers through her hair with one hand, and held a pair or chopsticks with the other.

“Please stop jerking your head around. You’re making this unnecessarily difficult.”

“Dexterity check,” Miu joked, ducking away from the utensils.

“Did someone knock?” K1-b0 asked, and Miu turned her head. K1-b0 took the opportunity to put a chopstick’s worth of grilled salmon in her mouth.

“Dex is my dump stat.”

“Eh didn’t understahnd eh werd of that,” Miu said, mouth full.

“The professor taught me critical thinking skills through playing Dungeons and Dragons.”

“Wow. Nerd alert.”

“Um… Miu?”

“Spit it out, don’t swallow,” she shot back playfully.

“Since the Professor had to leave so suddenly… well. He was planning on taking me clothes shopping today. He only gave me one outfit along with our school uniform. I should probably get a few more things.”

“I mean I don’t have anything better to do. It’s Sunday right? We just gotta avoid the sperm in Harajuku.”

* * *

 

“Can I ask?” Miu spoke quietly, sitting tight next to K1-b0 on the subway. “Why Ren dumped us so suddenly.”

“I… am not the only robot the Professor has made,” K1-b0 replied, head down and hair hidden under a large newsboy’s hat. As long as someone wasn’t paying too much attention, he looked human. Almost. “There was an issue in a factory in Osaka producing microchips. It escalated past what the engineers could do and he was called in for an emergency consultation. I don’t know anything other than-”

“Mom **_loook_** , a robot!”

“Dear, that’s not a…”

A young boy and his mother sat diagonally to Miu and K1-b0, the mother looking quietly horrified as K1-b0 looked at the child, slightly curious.

“Aren’t you cosplayers supposed to change at the event?” the lady snapped irritably at K1-b0. “You’re scaring my son.”

“I… madam, your son is correct,” K1-b0 replied simply, noting the boy was far more amused than scared. “Would you prefer I remove my face-plate?”

K1-b0 pressed two fingers to his temples, to an audible click, then leaned forward slightly, letting the white plastic fall into an open hand.

The mother screamed, covering her son’s eyes as he giggled in between “I told you so!”s.

“Why would you?!” she cried, furious, to the rest of the train staring at them.

“You insisted I wasn’t a robot and shouldn’t be wearing a costume in public. Is there anything else wrong with me that you wish to air grievances about at this time?” he added.

Miu couldn’t help but notice **_exactly_** how smug he was.

* * *

 

“Talk about showing how big your dick is,” Miu nudged, as they walked back to the dorms to dump their duffel bags before shopping.

“Metaphorical dick, yes,” K1-b0 replied with a small smile. “I do not understand, though. Why is it that children, for lack of a better word, are excited to see me, while adults revile? Would it be easier if I had a more human face?”

“Prolly not. Unless you can pass the uncanny valley.”

“The Professor and I have had many a long nights’ debate on the topic. I feel perhaps like Stephen Hawking. In his lifetime, far better voice synthesis was coded, but he kept the low quality older one, as it was his voice. I don’t feel there is yet an adequate human face I could have, and I am not sure what I’d do when one was available to me.”

“Swap ‘em.”

“Hm?” K1-b0 looked perplexed as they approached Miu’s dorm.

“Like, make your head detachable, and swap between ‘em, your current, and a quote-enquote realistic one,” Miu replied shrugging.

K1-b0 pondered the thought, but didn’t walk any further.

“It’s daytime Sunday. Guests are allowed,” Miu said, holding open the door, ushering him inside.

“Oh! I wasn’t made aware. Um, do I… remove my shoes?”

“Yeah. There’s slippers,” Miu replied with a wave of her free hand. “What did you do in the old suit?”

“The Professor made the power suit self-clean the soles.”

“Ah. Was wondering what those gland things were at your ankles,” Miu said with a smirk.

“I am curious. Am I a boy? Would I be able to come in on weekdays?” K1-b0 asked to no-one in particular as they walked up two flights of steps to the first year’s floor. Miu unlocked the room without knocking.

“Hey!” came a shriek.

“Just dropping off my shit and GTFO’ing,” Miu replied, exasperated. “Naked?”

“No, you just scared me.”

“Keebutt is here,” Miu added, rolling her eyes.

“Just… be quick,” Kaede replied, slightly annoyed.

Miu threw open the door, and Kaede’s mouth dropped open.

“Kee… K1-b0? You… you look good,” Kaede said, fumbling for what to say, sitting at her electronic keyboard with headphones twisted around her neck as she looked gobsmacked at K1-b0 in regular clothing. K1-b0 nervously pulled at the collar of his shirt in response.

Miu broke the tension by laughing loudly and slapping K1-b0 hard enough on the back to almost throw off his gyroscope. “Taking this bag of chrome clothes shopping, back later.”

“Um, yeah, okay. Actually… do you want some help?”

“What are you, some kind of fashionista?” Miu joked.

“I don’t wear jorts on the weekend,” Kaede retorted back, jabbing a thumb at Miu’s pile of clothes in the corner.

“Those are tactical jorts!”

“I’m stuck anyway,” Kaede said, sweeping her hand across a pile of strewn papers. “I need to get up from this composition for a while. If it’s okay.”

Miu looked at K1-b0 for his answer.

“I… would prefer it. I am still unused to being in public without the Professor, and would prefer the safety in numbers.”

“So he wishes it, so shall it be,” Miu replied, shrugging.

* * *

 

Kokichi was throwing darts on the wall when K1-b0 unlocked the door, also, surprisingly, without knocking first.

“Kokichi asked me not to, he’s a light sleeper and naps at odd hours,” K1-b0 had whispered as he’d twisted open the knob.

The dart sliced a centimeter to the right of K1-b0’s face, and he didn’t even flinch.

Kokichi, meanwhile, screamed and fell off his bed.

“You told me not to knock,” K1-b0 said nonchalantly as he dumped his duffel bag on his bed. “I am going to request you relinquish a dresser or some closet space for me. I have clothing.”

Kokichi blinked at K1-b0 for a few moments, mouth agape like a fish.

“So now can I see if you have a dick?” he finally settled on asking.

K1-b0 just held out a black fabric covered hand. “I am still in a power suit. It is just much thinner now.”

“All over?” Kokichi whined. “Laaaaaame.”

“I am staying two, possibly three nights, and will be out of your hair,”K1-b0 commented, changing the subject. “I need to get more clothes.”

Kokichi looked out into the hallway, Miu and Kaede waiting at the door. “I’m coming. If those two are helping, you’ll walk out dressed like some cross between a third string orchestra member and a stripper.”

K1-b0’s face plate reddened. “I… I wish I could refute that observation. Just please… I’m not going to ask you to be nice because that isn’t who you are, but don’t go out of your way to be mean?”

Kokichi collected up the darts. “My promises are about as good as the paper they’re written on but I’ll do what I can.”

“You said it aloud.”

Kokichi snickered, hand over his mouth as he grabbed a sling bag. “Say that back again, slowly, this time, K1-b0. Put those processors your grandpa put in you to use.”


	2. Strike Him Down

“Ren’s gotta be loaded. He keeps covering our food,” Miu commented between bites as they ate in a restaurant in the shopping arcade.

“The Professor knows it can’t make up for not being here himself, but it’s something,” K1-b0 replied. “And he thinks he’s already solved their problem, so he’ll be back tomorrow night.”

“Ren?” Kokichi asked, curiously, poking at his food.

“K1-b0’s not-dad.”

“Since when did **_you_** get on a first name basis with the fogey?” Kokichi asked, confused.

“Since I found out he’s 26,” Miu replied. Kaede and Kokichi stared.

“I guess I just assumed he’d be a lot older, being a University professor,” Kaede said apologetically.

“He actually prefers people to,” K1-b0 replied, shrugging, drumming his fingers against the empty tray-free stretch of table in front of him. “Most don’t take him seriously otherwise.” K1-b0 turned to Kokichi. “You don’t need to wait for anything, eat.”

“Didn’t you order though?” Kokichi asked, frowning.

“Hot tea. I feel awkward sitting in a restaurant and not getting anything at all. And I can at least enjoy the smell.”

“Well, if you’re insisting,” Kokichi said, picking up a French fry and shoving it up K1-b0’s nose, laughing, before inhaling a bite of croquette burger.

K1-b0 reached over and plucked a fry off Kokichi’s tray. “If you’re going to do that, at least finish the job,” he said with a smile, shoving it in his empty nostril.

* * *

 

The four of them laughed and chatted, squashing through the turnstile in the subway, when a security guard roughly grabbed K1-b0 on the shoulder.

“Mask off, now,” he demanded, politely, but sternly. Kokichi shuffled, worried, clearly uncomfortable with any kind of authority. Miu stepped between him and the security guard, seeing him unclench a fist from the corner of her eye.

“My name is K1-b0, sir, and I am a Todai developed robot,” K1-b0 said methodically, like he’d been stopped many times before or practiced with Ren. He carefully dropped his packages around him and loosened his faceplate like Miu had seen him do that morning. “If you have any questions I can direct you to the engineering team,” he added, face off and sensors and wires exposed behind it.

The security guard stood dumbfounded as K1-b0 reattached his face. No wonder why his sensors needed cleaning so often.

“My rail pass,” K1-b0 said, holding out a picture ID. “I do not have a birth certificate, but here is my identification from the university, and my own high school ID,” he added, flipping cards up for the guard to see. “May I be on my way?”

The security guard frowned. “No. We got a report from a hysterical woman about a cosplayer marching your description frightening people on the train. You need to come with me. Alone.”

Miu saw Kokichi quaking behind her, trying to look casual and failing horribly.

“I’m a witness,” Miu said, sharply. “And…” Miu was going to pay later, but she’d take her chances. “He’s a robot, which means he’s property. Taking him from us constitutes theft.”

“You’re making excuses,” the guard said, clamping an arm down on K1-b0. “Come with me peacefully, **_thing_**.”

“She’s not lying, and I have the paperwork for that too,” K1-b0 added, almost in monotone as though he was detaching himself from the situation.

The guard pulled hard on his arm, and K1-b0 made an odd warble as the whole thing went limp. “And now you’ve just done about 70,000 yen’s worth of property damage,” K1-b0 added cooly. “I’d like you to know that my eyes are cameras, and I have both this and the earlier incident of which you speak recorded. My creators will be contacting the railway with the bill, unless you’d like it sent to your house personally?” he added, raising the volume of his voice with each accusation.

Miu started to understand. K1-b0 has probably been taught to make a scene in situations like these- a crowd of onloookers- potential witnesses- had gathered.

A second security guard came. Kokichi was grabbing Miu’s hand now, shaking with all the attention. K1-b0 stood his ground, right arm still clearly limp.

Was Miu hyperventilating, or Kokichi? Both? She couldn’t tell.

But she had the foresight to sneak a phone into her hand and text Ren their station and location as three guards were dragging K1-b0 away and another two were working crowd control.

Five minutes.

Ten.

Thirty.

Kaede, Kokichi, and Miu huddled in a café, waiting. They weren’t leaving without K1-b0, hell or high water. Kokichi gripped K1-b0’s packages as if his life meant it, knuckles white.

Several times, the security passed by and told them to stop loitering, and thankfully, the café owner insisted he couldn’t kick out behaving patrons from her store. Thank goodness Kokichi knew her. He seemed to know just about everyone in strange places, and when their drinks emptied, they were mysteriously replaced without any marks on their tab.

“Fuck the police,” he muttered. “These aren’t even real police. They’re rent-a-cops.”

Silence as they sipped and glowered at the security guard glaring at them through the glass.

* * *

 

Miu’s phone buzzed.

WHERE ARE YOU.

CAFÉ LUNA, she ticked, JUST PAST THE WEST TURNSTILE.

STAY THERE, I SENT HELP, replied Ren.

THEY BROKE HIS ARM, Miu added. WE HAVE HIS CLOTHES AND I HAVE HIS WALLET, SANS ID.

THEY WHAT.

BROKE. HIS. ARM.

Ren didn’t reply for a few minutes. WELL THIS JUST BECAME A LAWSUIT. THANKS. CAN YOU FIX HIM? I CANT THROW MYSELF ON A FLIGHT TONIGHT,  I TRIED. I’LL BE OUT ON THE BULLET TRAIN IN THE MORNING. BEST I GOT. I’M STILL STUCK WITH THESE FREAKING ENGINEERS AND THEY WON’T SHUT UP.

Miu laughed quietly at the moment of levity, then replied to Ren’s question.

IF HE WALKS ME THROUGH IT.

Silence again as the three of them huddled around Miu’s phone like their own lives depended on it.

YOUR HEADMASTER SHOULD BE COMING SHORTLY. JUST STAY PUT.

* * *

 

A girl with a perpetual frown and gorgeous lavender-dyed hair strode into the café, scanning, before clicking her way over to the group of three.

“Kyoko!” Kaede gasped. “Hiiiiiii!”

Kyoko Kirigiri, Hope’s Peak junior, Ultimate Detective, and daughter of the headmaster, sat in the free seat between Kaede and Miu.

“Good afternoon, Kaede, we’re here to grab everyone. Father is having a word with security. Kokichi, thanks for texting the school.”

“I didn’t do shit,” Kokichi insisted, head down.

Kyoko was about to refute his statement, but thought better of it.

“Do you have everything of K1-b0’s?”

“Except his ID cards,” Kaede replied. “He was holding his school and train IDs. Miu managed to get his wallet and phone.”

“We can always print a new school ID,” Kyoko said, sighing. “Between us, Mr. Iidabashi always walked K1-b0 to and from school when he went home for the night. Today is the first time he’s ridden public transit without his father.”

The three of them were gobsmacked.

“Mr. Iidabashi actually let us know that Miu was escorting him back today. He regrets not being here for the first time K1-b0 would ride transit alone.”

“Japan is supposed to be safe!” Kaede cried. “I rode alone on the trains when I was like seven!”

“Yeah, because you’re normal,” Kokichi said with a frown. “Be a hair different and you’re fucked. Nail that stands out and all.”

“K1-b0 wasn’t even doing anything. The guard cornered us!” Kaede cried.

“Yeah try being an immigrant. Or wear alt fashion. Anything that isn’t “proper”,” Kokichi retorted, standing up and dusting himself off. “Let’s bail,” he added, sounding high and mighty, but clearly relieved.

Headmaster Kirigiri was walking toward the café, hugging a clearly shaken K1-b0 to his side.

* * *

K1-b0 said nothing in the van ride back to the school, merely holding his bad arm to his chest. He looked like he would have been crying, but he’d emptied his tear ducts the night before and they hadn’t been refilled.

So the five of them sat in silence as the Headmaster drove everyone back to campus.

That’s when Miu noticed something else. Something far worse. K1-b0’s eyes weren’t projecting light, and she saw they were cracked.

The security guards must have smashed them.

* * *

 

Miu took K1-b0’s broken arm and slung it around her back, holding it still with her hand on his, on her hip.

“Miu, I can see,” K1-b0 warbled. “Enough, at least. They only broke three of my four cameras.”

Miu pulled him tighter, but gently; K1-b0 still winced a little. “I… I didn’t do anything,” she whispered.

“You stayed. You called the Professor,” K1-b0 said.

“I called you **_property_**!” Miu cried out, as the other four of them stopped in their tracks.

“You were trying to **_help_** me by doing that!” K1-b0 snapped back.

She’d never seen him mad before. Upset, sure. But not like this.

K1-b0 froze. “I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. This is all my-”

“Nobody should get assaulted by rent-a-cops for existing,” Kokichi butted in, fire in his eyes. “ ** _Nobody_**.”

Another person Miu had never once seen get angry.

Headmaster Kirigiri stepped in, literally and metaphorically.

“Everyone, it’s been a rough day, and normally I’d still have to be asking for testimony but, K1-b0, did you record everything?”

“Yes,” K1-b0 choked out.

“Is there some way we can watch it? Can you submit it as evidence? Say, the last 24 hours?”

Miu turned red and looked down, but she’d rather his name be cleared than having it on the record that he massaged her to sleep.

“The Professor would have to download it and convert it to a standard feed, but yes,” K1-b0 said shakily. “My memory is time-stamped, and the conversion automatically blurs all faces and minors though. There won’t be a way to get a clear shot of the specific guards. It was that or accidentally record things like… um… I dorm with someone underage. It’s clear in my memory but the act of downloading it…”

Miu noticed K1-b0 was rambling, as did their upperclassman detective.

“Father, I don’t doubt he could fill in the gaps as needed. Even a blurry video would be plenty. I think they need to rest.” Kyoko looked over at K1-b0, as she wrung her glove-covered hands.

“Fair,” Headmaster Kirigiri said. “I don’t normally allow this, but the four of you can stay in the guest suite together tonight. You’re all excused from classes tomorrow if you’re willing to give statements.”

“Aren’t you supposed to separate people to prevent collaboration?” Kokichi said with an eyebrow up.

“You didn’t do anything wrong, we just want proof Hope’s Peak students weren’t instigating here,” Kyoko said, arms crossed. “Unless you’d **_like_** to admit to some more petty vandalism.”

“What petty vandalism?” Kokichi asked whistling. “And don’t go asking Kiibs for the tapes. He wouldn’t have any. Minor, remember? I’m **_iiiiiiiinviiiiiisible_**.”

K1-b0 barked a small laugh.

* * *

 

Miu wasn’t sure what was nicer- the suite in the Chancellor’s hall for distinguished guests visiting campus or Ren’s hotel suite.

Different kinds of nice, though, she mused. The campus suite was in a lavish Western style- two king poster beds, one per bedroom, connecting to a sitting room between. Kaede asked for a futon, though, then Miu, then Kokichi, who whined he’d have a king bed to himself otherwise.

The cleaning staff came back with four futons for the sitting room, though K1-b0 protested he didn’t sleep.

“Well, you can at least lay down and rest your eyes,” one of them insisted.

K1-b0 didn’t argue.

Miu took advantage of the hospitality, and demanded her tools brought up to them.

The first thing she did was drag K1-b0 to the bathroom. Or, more specifically, asked him to follow.

He’d been dragged enough that day.

Gently, she pressed her fingers to his temples, removed his face, and filled his wiper fluid tank.

“It’s just water, for now, hope that’s okay,” she said, uncharacteristically gently as she snapped it back in place as he sat on the closed toilet lid as she worked.

The moment after he checked it was on properly with his good hand, he pulled Miu in close, convulsing as he bawled.

* * *

 

“Do you want another refill?” Miu asked, as his crying ceased.

“C-could you?” K1-b0 choked out.

“It’s not hard. Hang on,” Miu replied, but, before she could take his face plate off, he already held it in his hands.

“Don’t put that back on. We’ll go into the big room and I can get rid of any shattered glass or plastic in there,” Miu said, peering inside his face as she refilled the tear duct again. “Okay, you’re good.”

Shakily, K1-b0 stood up, hugging Miu with his in-broken arm.

“Can I strip you in front of everyone?” Miu asked, holding the lifeless hand. “I can’t fix your eyes but I can try and give you your arm back.”

“That would… yes please.”

K1-b0 still sounded detached.

Miu walked with him, and helped sit him down on one of the futons.

“Hey…” Kokichi said quietly. Miu could see a shine on his face that only meant one thing- he’d been crying.

“Kokichi, help me undress K1-b0.” Miu said, commanding. It came across almost mean but Kokichi didn’t seem to care.

“Which arm did they break?” he asked, uncharacteristically gentle.

“Right.”

“Which eye works?”

“Third. Inner right eye. Both left and outer right are broken.”

“So,” Kokichi chattered, trying to keep K1-b0 engaged. “Your dad’s like ten years older than us? So how old are you?”

“Ten. I turn eleven this year.” K1-b0 still sounded hollow and Kokichi frowned.

“What are you, some kinda genius? Dude. When I was ten… um, yeah, I already ran the worlds largest prank site. So um same boat and all that.”

K1-b0 warbled, and Kokichi brightened.

It was indistinct, but K1-b0 had laughed.

* * *

“-and then she said, ‘No, ma’am, that’s not my llama!’”

K1-b0 was howling, as much as he could in repair mode.

“Ugh, tough audience,” Kokichi groaned, as he and Kaede held parts of K1-b0 as Miu worked.

“Well, I am aluminum composite,” K1-b0 shot back.

Kaede snorted.

“I think I’ve fixed the problem,” Miu said. “I’m closing you up now.”

Carefully, Miu shut everything closed, sealing K1-b0’s chest plate up after the arm. K1-b0 flexed his fingers, then bent and twisted his joints, before pulling both Kokichi and Miu in for a hug.

“Heeeeey, you don’t have a dick!”

* * *

 

K1-b0 wasn’t the best pillow, not by a long shot. But Miu couldn’t think of any other that hugged so warmly, or teased her hair until she drifted away.

Miu normally hated sleep. It was a need, a last resort. After rousing from her coma, any bed made her worried she d wake up, Rip van Winkle, ten, twenty years later, the world moving on without her.

Futons were better. Hospitals didn’t have them. A roommate helped. She’d warned Kaede to wake her, violently if needed, if she didn’t immediately arise with her alarm.

But sleeping with K1-b0 cradling her? Knowing he was awake and taking care of her?

She couldn’t remember the last time she’d slept that well.

* * *

 

“Mornin’”

Miu blinked warily and allowed K1-b0 to help her sit up. She had a crick in her back a mile wide, but felt extremely rested.

Ren could not say the same. He looked drunk, but didn’t smell of alcohol, just bad BO from racing to the first train back to Tokyo on a sleepless night.

“I fixed his arm,” Miu said, drowsily.

“I can see that,” Ren said, gently. “Go back to sleep if you need to, I just needed to move you off to look at Kiib’s eyes.”

“No way,” Miu pouted, glaring.

“Come here, bud,” Ren said quietly, trying not to wake the other two. Ren pulled K1-b0 into a tight hug, and wouldn’t let go.

“I can’t believe… some people…” he muttered.

“It’s not like you would have lost me. I’m backed up,” K1-b0 said, reassuring himself as much as Ren.

“Principle of the thing!” Ren snapped, and Kokichi bolted awake. Ren panicked, almost jumping out of his own skin. “S-sorry,” Ren muttered.

Kokichi immediately relaxed. “So you’re Keebutt’s old man,” Kokichi said, shrugging, as if his own freak out hadn’t happened.

Ren winced. “Older than you, at least,” he sputtered.

“You’ve broken me, Miu has, and I’ve certainly broken myself,” K1-b0 insisted as REN leaned forward and opened K1-b0’s face.

“Intent,” Ren said, frowning, peering among the rat’s nest of heat shrink and wire. “None of us were **_trying_** to harm you. **_That_** rat bastard was. Luckily, they only damaged the lenses. I just need to replace them. I need to order more LED screens for your eye plates but you’ll be able to see. It’ll just look like your eyes are broken. That okay?”

K1-b0 nodded, and Ren put on some white gloves.

“Just hold still, okay?” Ren asked, holding K1-b0’s chin as he gently unscrewed the three cracked camera lenses and replaced them from his box of kerned supplies. “How’s that?”

“Better than before. I suppose they were due for a cleaning.”

“Little fogged up, too. Can you follow my finger?”

Ren let go of K1-b0’s chin and slowly moved his finger back and forth. With his faceplate off, everyone watched as the swivel in K1-b0’s head rotated, his four connected camera lenses moving in tandem to track the digit.

Kokichi watched, enthralled.

“All good?” Ren asked.

“Yes!” K1-b0 replied enthusiastically.

“Let me clean out in there before you put your face back,” Ren said. “Looks like all of you are up so I’ll use the vacuum.”

Ren took out a tiny little suction device from his tools, noticing Kokichi’s rapt attention. “So, what are you in for, kid?” Ren asked, rolling his eyes.

“Supreme leader.”

“Bullshit,” Ren replied. “You’re a supreme leader and I’m the Queen of England.”

“ ** _You_**. I like you,” Kokichi replied. “Ultimate prankster,” he admitted with a shrug. “I guess it’s what you get when you’re a white hat hacker combined with a flash mob organizer.”

“You want to try?” Ren asked, holding up the miniature vacuum.

Kokichi beamed, and scooted over, snatching up the device.

* * *

 

“This is wholly unnecessary,” K1-b0 whimpered as Ren pushed him gently on his back.

“Miu greased you on Friday, but you didn’t ever buff it out,” Ren chided. “You’re getting self sufficient enough to take care of some of your own basic tasks, but…”

“I’ll do it myself later!” K1-b0 whined.

“It’s faster if we help, you’re going to be stuck with Headmaster Killy-giri as soon as you’re all dressed.”

“Oh, I gotta start using that,” Kokichi smirked.

“Fine,” K1-b0 said, flopping, as Ren soaked rags in grease and passed them to Miu, Kaede, and Kokichi.

“I call his crotch!” Kokichi shouted enthusiastically.

“And **_this_** is why I wanted to do it myself,” K1-b0 whined, as Miu took a hand and began to wax him. Kaede watched Miu and mimicked on the other side while Ren attacked his legs.

“Well you didn’t refute Miu doing it herself,” Kokichi mock-poured. “Keeeebo and Miiiiiu sittin’ in a tree… hey wait, old man, you okay with that? Miu’s kinda a skank.”

“‘ ** _Kind of_** ’?” Miu asked, puffing out her chest. “Fuck you. I’m **_extremely_** a skank, thank you,” Miu shot back.

* * *

 

“Tie?” K1-b0 asked nervously as he held the piece of fabric around his neck. “I’ve never done this before.”

Before Ren could even get to him, Kokichi was at his neck.

“You want a ‘too cool for school’ or a chokehold?”

K1-b0 facepalmed.

“Ugh, it’s no fun with your eyes broken,” Kokichi whined, tapping the shattered and dark LED screens. “Your eye overreactions are always pretty great.”

“Are they? I designed them!” K1-b0 said excitedly. “Well, the Professor actually programmed it all but…”

Kokichi grabbed both ends of the tie, pulling K1-b0 down a few centimeters with him. Ren twitched for a moment, but quickly eased as Kokichi walked K1-b0 through a Windsor, before pulling the knot apart to let K1-b0 try it himself.

K1-b0 pulled the sweater vest over his button-down shirt and slipped the brown uniform jacket on, before checking himself out in the mirror. Miu imagined his eyes would have been bright and happy, circumstances notwithstanding.

A rap on the door.

“Is everyone in here at least presentable?” Headmaster Kirigiri, Miu recognized the voice. Her head snapped towards the doorway. She was in pajamas, but she was dressed enough to not care.

“Still in lounge pants,” she cried to the hall. “If that’s un-naked enough for ya.”

The handle turned, and the Headmaster strode in, eyes clearly as red and puffy as Ren’s, likely equal lack of sleep.

“Well, Ren, looks like you’re getting your wish about making a huge scene. We’ve got reporters at the gates.”


	3. Keep Him Company

“The… press?” K1-b0 asked curiously.

“I… may have made a stink this morning while I was on the Shinkansen,” Ren said, grinning. “A few tweets and some well placed phone calls can do wonders.”

“Every time I say this school isn’t going to end up on the night’s news…” Headmaster Kirigiri sighed, head in his hands.

“Hey, none of your students **_did_ ** anything this time,” Ren said brightly.

K1-b0 sat down, shaking a little, and Ren’s face soured immediately.

“Bud?” Ren’s voice grew soft. “You… you’re not okay.”

“I don’t want to go out there,” K1-b0 whined quietly, turning his head away when Ren reached for him.

“Then you won’t. I’ll deal with them, okay? Sh-sh-sh. Just tell the headmaster everything you remember from yesterday and I’ll help download the footage later. Okay?”

K1-b0 nodded quietly.

“If you want to stand up and speak for yourself to the press, I’ll be with you the whole time, but just talking thorough it all with the Headmaster is incredibly brave. Do you understand?”

K1-b0 nodded again, and reached out for Ren.

“Why did you call the media?” he finally asked.

“Because… they- frigging train security, they should know better- they literally broke your arm and shattered your face. And they’re not going to get justice because right now…”

“I’m property,” K1-b0 finished for Ren as he trailed off. “I have no legal rights.”

“Nobody would question twice after talking with you that that’s anything but false. You’re a **_person_ ** and that shouldn’t even be up for debate.”

K1-b0 smiled a little. “I remember right after I was aware the media came in to talk to me. It was… patronizing. I’d like to be seen as… as a person.”

Miu frowned. By K1-b0’s reply, he still felt like he didn’t, like he shouldn’t. And it hurt her a little.

Kokichi stood up. “I’m going with you.”

“What? Why?”

“Nobody gets to pick on you but me.”

“Oh? And what about Hiyoko?” K1-b0 asked, stifling a laugh.

Kokichi just turned white. “No comment,” he muttered, deflated.

The remaining ice in the room melted as Kokichi mock-pouted in a corner.

“Well, I’m coming too,” Kaede said sternly. “Ooooonce I’m dressed.”

K1-b0 looked to Miu.

“If you even needed to ask, you don’t fucking know me,” she said with a shrug.

* * *

Begrudgingly, Headmaster Kirigiri walked with the small group to the southern gate.

“Take it outside,” he chided at Ren. “And don’t make Hope’s Peak look bad. We don’t need **_more_ ** negative press after the pastry incident.”

Ren stifled a laugh. “Oh god, I remember that. Hey, we play our cards right and you’ll be **_extremely_ ** sympathetic, yeah?”

“For your sake, I hope so.”

The headmaster turned tail back to the main campus buildings, and as soon as he was out of sight, Ren addressed the group.

“Fuck adults,” he muttered. “Saving face is bullshit.”

Kokichi looked like he had stars in his eyes. “Daddy, can you adopt me too?” he whined.

“Fuck you to hell,” Ren replied, flicking Kokichi’s ear. “But if you’ve got nobody to spend New Year’s with, I suppose I can tolerate you for a night.”

* * *

K1-b0’s hand grew hot in Miu’s as Ren addressed the small crowd of reporters. It seemed like Ren at least was used to this- as a genius roboticist he likely had to do address the press often enough.

Quickly, though, their attention focused on K1-b0.

“Look at the poor thing’s eyes, they’re all smashed up!”

“Please, I implore you not to call me ‘ **_thing’_ ** ,” K1-b0 cut in, a bit exasperated. “My name is K1-b0. Like Kibou, “hope”,” he added for clarity. “I am aware that I am a ‘thing’ but I don’t much like being called that.”

“Mister Iidabashi, we know you’re a robotics genius and all, but is this Keeeebo remotely operated?”

K1-b0 just looked down, shuffled his feet, and gripped Miu’s hand a little tighter. They’d asked the same thing ten years ago when he’d been interviewed last. Some normal people just didn’t want to believe he was real, even with him in front of them. It was easier for some to think it was an elaborate hoax, and K1-b0 was extremely glad when attention fell off him and onto the next fad of the week.

Ren glared. “Okay. First off he isn’t. Second. And this is the more important half. **_Even if he were_ ** , he paid to go on the train, he minded his own business, and yet several security guards dealt close to half a million yen in damages. I’ve already fixed what I could but I’m going to have to build him new eyes from scratch. Here’s the rub- I want them brought to justice not as someone destroying personal property, I want them brought to trial for **_assault_ **.”

“You can’t bring someone to trial for assaulting a machine.” a reporter replied.

“Exactly.” Ren replied, glaring into the cameras. “But you can for them assaulting a **_person_ ** . K1-b0’s been alive for a decade now, and I’ve been fighting for robot ethics and rights for years. The fact that this is even still a debate is **_insane_ **.”

K1-b0 shook, and Miu held on tighter.

* * *

Miu gently brushed K1-b0’s hair out with her fingers in the little engineering shed after the rest of the crazy day. She’d be going back with K1-b0 and Ren for the next few days, at least until things blew over, but it was nice to have a little private time before she packed a suitcase for Ren’s inn.

“You did great,” she said, untangling another knot with her fingers. “Screw the fuckers. Or not, actually. I wouldn’t put my pussy on the same continent as them.”

K1-b0 turned red, and when Miu looked close, noticed the light was faded and blotchy around his eyes.

“Hey, hey, some of your LEDs are probably loose. Want me to crack you open?”

K1-b0 frowned a little, before putting a hand, palm down to steel himself. “Why are you so nice to me?” he demanded suddenly. “You’re kind of mean to everyone else, and extremely crass to boot.”

“You know how Mikan totally fucking gets off on taking care of people?”

K1-b0 blushed again. “I don’t see how this is relevant, but yes. I suspect it’s to make up for the fact that she finds her validation from being needed by others.”

“When I was like… when I was like ten, I had a sudden fever. Then coma. My family basically left me in the hospital to die. I was a wild kid, and my parents both worked crazy long hours, so I just did what I wanted. Half nature half nurture problems, I guess. But I’m no fucking psychiatrist.

“Anyway. I wake up from this thing and my brain is on-fucking-fire. And it wakes up first. So the fucking nurses had to still bathe and feed and dress me. I couldn’t even wipe my own ass for three months while I started coming ‘round.

“Family had left me. I had no friends. I managed a grant from a university to patent all the shit that started pouring out from the smoke between my ears. It was just me and an increasingly cluttered workshop until I got scouted for Hope’s. I’m still not sure why I’m here. Kaz is the better mechanic, and Chihiro can program rings around me. But **_you_ ** didn’t judge.”

“I… I cant judge,” K1-b0 replied, tracing a black-cloth covered hand over Miu’s, and blushing from the contact. “As you’ve noticed by now, I was extremely sheltered. Partially from fear- some justified- from the Professor, and quite a bit more from me.”

“Y’know, humans take medicine for extreme anxiety. Maybe you’re due for a debug?”

“This might surprise you, but I used to be a lot worse. The Professor worked out some of the bad code that caused involuntary shaking and stuttering if I processed too much at once, and some of it was just from how I found myself when I became aware. That I’m working though on my own.”

“Your childhood that fucked up too?” Miu barked out.

“Not… quite in the same way, but I suppose ‘fucked up’ is a succinct way of putting it,” K1-b0 said shyly, looking down at his hand.

“Look, it’s harder to tell what you’re thinking from body language with your eyes shot to hell, but your face is as red as a woman’s post-o. Spit it, Keebs.”

“Can we cuddle?”

Miu snorted, looking around the little shed.  “Workbench is a bit tight for both of us to lay on. If I fall off, you’re going to carry me to the nurses’ office. And corroborate any stories I make up about the bruises.”

“I won’t let you fall,” K1-b0 said, defiantly, as he linked his hands around her waist and gently pulled them both back to lay squeezed on the workbench together.

Miu adjusted. He was hard and stiff, and trading out his thick padded safety suit for his wetsuit-thin one under clothing didn’t help. But he was pleasantly warm, and was slowly ticking like a metronome. Was he… trying to mimic a heartbeat?

K1-b0 hummed discordantly, gently but firmly locking his arms in place to prevent her from shifting too much, teasing the ends of her hair with a hand.

It felt… safe.

“Okay, we’re cuddling, you fucking romantic,” Miu said, once it seemed like they’d settled into a position that more or less worked, with K1-b0 as the protective big spoon, despite Miu’s several centimeters of additional height.

He was like a little jet pack, in a brown school uniform.

“You say this as if there’s more,” K1-b0 replied, head nested in the small of her neck. Thank goodness he didn’t breathe, his face had to be engulfed in the rats nest of her hair.

“Well you can’t start telling me your childhood was fucked up and **_not_ ** freaking follow through. I don’t like men who pull out early.”

“Well… The Professor was fourteen, a second year in middle school, when…”.

K1-b0 trailed off.

“Ren told me about the crash,” Miu eventually supplied to break the silence.

“Oh.”

Silence, as K1-b0 buried his face further in Miu’s hair, before eventually speaking up again. “He hacked a bunch of sites and lifted whole sections of code while he was stuck in the hospital. I was cobbled together from that. He was bored, and upset, and angry, and I came out confused and nervous and strange.

“My first body was a modified toy. One of those SpYdr things.”

“The three legged robots that could fold up into a sphere?” Miu asked, giggling. “I remember seeing the ads as a little kid. Which one were you? The red one? The purple?”

“The teal one,” K1-b0 said, embarrassed. “It was one of the Professor’s brother’s birthday gifts.”

“Oh god he must have been popular at school that year. I know I would have gone wet for somebody with one.”

“Miu, you would have been four- to- six years old,” K1-b0 replied, laughing.

“Don’t judge,” Miu said, shifting a little as she nudged his hand into a new position. He was right on one thing, he clamped down and wasn’t letting her fall.

“Anyway…” K1-b0 continued. “I did my best to comfort him as he made me a more humanlike body. The first few were… shall we say, extremely flawed.”

“The waitress at Denny’s said something like that,” Miu smirked.

“Back then, I lived in that little spider-sphere thing. I actually more or less controlled the bipedal humanoids he made remotely, since they were hardly reliable. So the media complaining about me being remotely controlled earlier wasn’t quite wrong. It’s just…”

“You’re taking it personally,” Miu said. “When I started inventing people were constantly trying to find the adult who was using me as a sock puppet to make their discoveries seem more impressive. Ren may have scrapped and remixed his way to making you, but you’re a hell of a lot more than the sum of your parts, I think.”

Miu’s back suddenly grew very very warm.

“Thanks,” he muttered. “I know I still have that little thing somewhere. Sometimes I’ll do the inverse and control it remotely. It can scale walls as long as I find a good foothold. I’d get a great view of the city at night if I climbed up to the roof.”

“Did you have that annoyingly squeaky voice it was designed with?” Miu asked, teasingly.

“I did,” K1-b0 said, laughing a little.

“Any reason you have a hard-on for my hair?” Miu asked, changing the subject a bit, as she felt K1-b0 very gently tug and twirl the ends.

“Smells nice,” K1-b0 said simply. “Also, it is long overdue for a trim. Your hair is all split ends.”

“How would you know, smartass? You wear a wig.”

Miu felt his head press further into her neck and warm.

“It’s not frequent anymore, but I used to do a lot more caretaking for the Professor. Even in the spider bot, fetching things for him or managing some of his affairs when he was in too much pain to get out of bed. Eventually I had a working bipedal body, he would continuously work on me when he was good enough to do so, and I him when he was not.”

“So **_that’s_ ** why you give a killer massage,” Miu nudged, realizing the implications of helping a double amputee. “See, and here I figured **_you_ ** were a whore.”

“Guilty,” K1-b0 replied, laughing into the back of Miu’s neck. “The Professor’s animatronic legs are certainly useful, but they are far from perfect. And they certainly don’t prevent or stop phantom limb pain.”

“Mhmm…” Miu replied, unsure where to go from there.

Minutes passed in silence.

“Hey Keebs?” Miu finally asked, punctuating the rhythmic sound of ticking. “Is that noise… you?”

“Does it bother you?” K1-b0 asked nervously. “I… er, I wished to mimic a heartbeat.”

“I just wanted to make sure there wasn’t a bomb in here or anything,” Miu replied. “I do **_technically_ ** share this shed with Kaz-poo-ichi. You some kinda romantic? Watch too much porn?”

“N—not porn,” K1-b0 replied, face hot pressed against Miu’s neck. “I do enjoy a good romance film, though.”

“Oh, really now?” Miu asked, a hint of sarcasm in her voice. “So that means I know **_exactly_ ** what you want.”

“You… do?” K1-b0 asked.

Miu nudged, but K1-b0 didn’t take the hint.

“On your back, Kink-bo,” Miu ordered, and nudged again. This time, he complied, and Miu wiggled around to face him on the cramped workbench.

She smirked, a gleam in her eye.

“This ones for you, Vanilla,” she snarked, then leaned in, planting a kiss on his lips.

K1-b0 took a moment to process what she’d done, heating up, face red, before smiling in the gesture, cradling her on his stomach with a hand on her neck and another down the small of her back, trying to mimic what he’d seen on-

Miu broke the moment, jerking away, gagging.

“I… I tried, Kiibs…” she muttered, near tears as she spat onto the concrete floor.

K1-b0 just held her tighter. “Do not apologize. That was a lovely gesture. But what is wrong?”

“Wax,” Miu admitted. “You tasted like… well I think it’s what licking a car would taste like. Bitter. Real nasty. Probably to prevent people from eating it.”

K1-b0 turned red. “You’re correct, that is not intended for human consumption. Hm… this is a challenge.”

“I fucking ruined it.”

“And I did not, two days ago?” K1-b0 replied laughing, trying to soothe Miu’s ego. “We’ll just… have to get creative,” K1-b0 added, detangling Miu’s hair with a hand.

Miu sulked, squashed on K1-b0’s chest until he helped her flip over so she could breathe.

“What’s with the hair fetish?” Miu grumbled, noticing he was playing with it again.

“Assessing damage,” K1-b0 replied. “It’s all split ends. I was trying to see what I could salvage.”

“What, you cunt hair?”

Miu gigged at her own pun.

“The Professor’s… and when my own wig frays I style the replacement. When… when I was finally fully mobile in a humanoid body, he’d give me tasks to do to test my dexterity and fine tune it. Origami, cooking, papercrafting, that sort of thing. Some of the staff did too, laundry and cleaning, at least until the Professor found out about that.”

“What, so he can order you around but others can’t? What a dom.”

“No, it was more like I was so eager to help that some of the… lazier staff… were giving me the tasks he was paying them for. When he found out, he was furious.”

“Oof.”

“I offered to be hired staff, but he didn’t want to give me preferential treatment. And when I started at Hope’s Peak I asked him if I could take a part time job outside after class. He… said no.”

“So the job at Denny’s?”

K1-b0 kept silent.

“Behind Ren’s butt, huh?” Miu said with a chuckle.

“I told him after I got it. I was supposed to start tomorrow but now…”

“Oh, so you have a little rebel in you huh?”

“You should have seen him. I don’t think I’ve **_ever_ ** seen someone so happy for being disobeyed before.”

“He’s happy you’re human, probably,” Miu replied. “And okay, I’m cramping. Leggo.”

“Hey, Miu?”

“Mmmm?” Miu asked, as K1-b0 slowly pushed them both up.

“Thanks.”

* * *

Miu dumped her duffel bag in the hotel room, before flopping down with a sigh. No suite this time, but it was more than enough space for a few nights.

“Call the front desk or my room if you need anything,” Ren said with a weary smile. “I know it’s only 6, but I gotta crash and my legs are are running on fumes.”

“You gotta plug ‘em in?” Miu barked out with a laugh.

Ren rapped one. “Yup. I need them off, too. It’s like walking on stilts. Can’t do it all day. Order yourself some dinner and charge it to the front desk. I’ll get it. And no foie gras. K1-b0 has a key to this room, if you want him to.”

Miu rolled her eyes. “Don’t blame me if we keep everyone up all night. **_You_ ** allowed it.”

“Just clean up after yourself,” Ren snapped back playfully.

Miu frowned as he shut the door behind himself to go sleep in his own home-within-a-hotel. It wasn’t as much fun making sexual jokes when people ran right back with them. Somehow, she enjoyed making people squirm uncomfortably.

Except K1-b0. Why **_did_ ** she go so easy on him?

* * *

Miu heard a rap on the door, and went to slide it open. K1-b0 was in his brand-new yukata he’d gotten on their Sunday shopping trip (had that only been two days ago? It felt so far away.) kneeling at the entryway with her bag of take-out before bowing deeply.

“I humbly request entrance to deliver your food,” K1-b0 said, almost hiding laughter in his keigo formal speech. Almost.

“Oh my god, my own sex slave,” Miu replied, lightly. “Kiss my feet and I’ll consider it.”

K1-b0 cocked his head. “I cannot tell if that’s an actual request or you’re joking.”

“Just come inside,” Miu sighed. “I’m too hungry to cause a-”

Miu’s room phone rang.

“I already picked up your dinner from the front desk?” K1-b0 half-asked. “Did you order from multiple establishments?”

“No… maybe the cunts mixed up my order?”

Miu cautiously walked over to the phone.

“Allo?”

“There’s a Mister Jass down here for you, Madam Iruma? A classmate of yours and K1-b0’s?”

“First name Hugh?” Miu sighed out.

“Yes he says his name is Hugh Ja-” the receptionist stared, before sighing. “Shall I turn the delinquent away?”

“No, you can tell Cock-ichi I’m in 210.”

“Thank you, madam.”

* * *

“Don’t worry about me,” Kokichi grinned, holding up a Family Mart bag. “Not like you care,” he said pointing to Miu, “or you eat,” he added, jabbing a pack of un-split chopsticks at K1-b0.

“Are you staying tonight?” K1-b0 asked incredulously. “Not that I mind, but I think we are booked solid and I’ll likely need to tend to the Professor tonight. Falling asleep off schedule and so early means he hasn’t taken his medication.”

Kokichi frowned. “Know those feels,” he muttered.

“Hm, did you say something, Kokichi?” K1-b0 asked curiously.

“Nah. You might want to get what passes for ears checked out,” he joked back, flicking one of K1-b0’s earphone-esque audio receptors. “I can just stay until forty before curfew otherwise. Nothing worse than Izumi banging on the door to make sure you’re back.”

K1-b0 smiled as Kokichi made himself comfortable. “So, I get to be the super awkward third wheel tonight! What sexytimes did I barge into? Can I join?”

“K1-b0 was going to cut my hair,” Miu said matter-of-factly, looking right at him as she downed her own food. “He’s been practically molesting it all day.”

“I… did not expect you to actually… aurgh,” K1-b0 said, being cut off by an elbow to the chest, courtesy of Miu, followed immediately by her low swear at hitting metal.

“Awwwww you two are hiding sooooomething,” Kokichi said in an annoying sing-song as he ripped a chunk of melon bread. “I love this. It’s better than cable. And don’t tell me you two were planning it. I can sniff a liar out at thirty paces.”

Miu rolled her eyes. “We weren’t planning on anything. But now that you’re here, yeah, I’m going to make you sit through getting a haircut.”

“Booooooring,” Kokichi sang.

“Your hair could use a trim as well, Kokichi,” K1-b0 said, observing the two eat and feeling awkward for having nothing in front of him. “It’s not as bad as Miu’s but I can see the split ends from here. If you don’t mind a futon, you can stay and sleep in my bedroom tonight. We have earplugs, goodness knows you’d need them when the Professor wakes up howling at two in the morning.”

“That… bad?” Kokichi asked, frowning.

“It can be,” K1-b0 replied honestly. “Between over-taxing himself, lack of food and sleep, and missed medication, it won’t be pretty later.”

“Is this… often?” Kokichi asked, gently, between bites.

“No, but when it does occur it’s **_work_ **. He was in a very bad car crash before I existed, so all I mentioned can get compounded with lucid nightmares. He was a child, but as the only survivor, he feels responsible.”

Kokichi looked down and away. “I’ll stay. You guys have an onsen here right? Can’t have a swanky Japanese inn in Tokyo without **_something_ **.”

“We are ranked in the top 100 in the country, I’ll have you know,” K1-b0 boasted, perking up, hands on hips.

“See, well now I **_have_ ** to stay,” Kokichi insisted. “Spa? Makeovers? What’s next, braiding each other’s hair and talking about cute boys?”

“Considering the notebook you draw in, this sounds like something you want to discuss further,” K1-b0 replied with a bright, honest smile.

Kokichi turned white.

“Is that… strange?” K1-b0 asked.

“Please,” Kokichi croaked out. “Don’t tell anyone.”

“Tell people what?” Miu asked, sticking her pinky in her ear. “Ear’s fulla wax again. I missed that.”

Kokichi’s color came back as quickly as it drained.

“Miu if your ears need a cleaning I could-” K1-b0 cut in helpfully, before she smacked him lightly with the plastic lid to her dinner.

“I mean, I’ll take you up on it,” she said. “But learn some **_tact_ ** , Keebs.”

  



End file.
